16 December 2020

QUALITY TIME: THE GREATEST GIFT YOU CAN GIVE YOURSELF.

The one person we are certain to spend our entire lives with, until our last breath, is ourselves.
It doesn’t matter what roles we have: child, parent, artist, executive, worker, farmer.
We are all human beings, with our needs, our passions, our virtues.

Getting along with ourselves, accepting ourselves for who we are, loving ourselves, knowing how to take care of ourselves, giving love and respect, knowing how to improve ourselves, are some of the tasks that we are called to fulfill in order to live a full life, full of meaning.

We have read it everywhere by now, that if you don’t know how to love yourself, it will be very difficult to love another person or be loved, and therefore live a happy life.
Love takes strange forms, and we all, as children, know something about that.

During this digital 2020 I have met so many human beings with different lives and roles, all searching for meaning in their lives.
I feel such tenderness when 20 year old boys and girls are in a hurry to find their way.
I feel compassion when managers in their forties ask me for help in learning how to fit into that role, but not give up their authenticity, this theme resonates with me a lot.
When moms have been dedicated to children for years, there comes a point when they ask, “What about me, what am I doing for me?” They say this to me, who has been waiting years to become a mom and who is an expert on “quality time for me.”
The doctor who wonders how to improve her empathy for the patients who rely on her profession.
The technicians who see only black and white, and who realize how difficult it is to meet the other in the relationship.

So many different realities, different needs, but I always start from the same point:

How are you, you, here, now?

Listen to yourself, listen to your breath, your heartbeat, your body.
Stop for a moment, no need for an hour, just three breaths.
Ahhhh.

What makes you feel good?

The six-month backpacking trip doesn’t count.
Winning the lottery isn’t either.
I ask you what makes you feel good right here, right now.
What can you give yourself by sticking with what’s there.

And here’s where the hard part begins, yes, I’ve always said that a path of personal growth is not a walk in the park, you have to commit yourself because the answers are all within you, others can’t do it for for you. First it has to start with you, you create the space, it’s your home. You arrange it, you tidy it up, you clean it, you furnish it.
Then, if you want, open the doors and windows, invite whoever you want, but it’s your home.

To be able to take responsibility for your life, it is important that you have clear:

  • how to take care of yourself;
  • how to love yourself;
  • how to listen to what you need;
  • how to give yourself what you need.

Simply said, if you want to get better, you must learn to treat yourself as you would treat the person you love most.

You are the one who gives yourself time, quality time.
Time that nurtures you, that does you good, ME-TIME.

You don’t need hours, not even hard practices. If you like doing them, if you are clear about practicing yoga, meditation, chanting, walking or any other activity that brings you to be with you, practice it.
But if you don’t know what you like yet, and you find it hard to figure out what you like, then proceed in small steps. Small, but steady steps. Devote a few minutes a day to you.

Spending hours in front of the television gives a momentary sense of relaxation, of entertainment, but does what you watch really nourish you? Does it give you emotion? Or do you go to bed at night with a sense of emptiness?
Eating and drinking give pleasure, yes, but do you take care of what you eat and drink?
Do you choose the people you talk to?

Pleasure is one of my favorite themes, and it’s the basis from which we can then understand what gives us motivation, what gives meaning to our lives.
These are all courses we’ve taken this year online, and will be back on the calendar in 2021, along with new courses on creativity, freedom, and authenticity.

Don’t let these vacations go by without meaning, looking only at what’s missing.
Learn to be with what’s there.

Need some inspiration?
From December 21 to January 7, every day on my Instagram profile at 5pm, I will be live with 7 minutes of my ME-TIME.

Each day I will also post the link on the Mestieri-LAB® page on LinkedIn and FB, so that I can offer wellness insights to as many people as possible.

Each day I will choose what makes me feel good in that moment, whether it’s a cup of tea, a walk, a laugh, a liberating cry, a drawing, a song, a scream, a nap or listening to silence.

I would really love to share these insights with you and then know if they were helpful.

A pine-scented hug, Marina